Most times living in a small town is great. Sometimes it’s not. Generally, local people like to point to the summer visitors as the source of all the bad behavior we see in these parts. All too often that turns out to be true, but the some-are people do not have a monopoly on bad behavior. We manage just fine on our own. Take, for example, the letter to the editor from Alexandra Leigh-Hunt in this week’s Sag Harbor Express.
In this letter, Ms. Leigh-Hunt, based on a rumor she heard from a “reliable source,” casts aside all evidence to the contrary and publicly calls her neighbors who volunteer as Trustees of the John Jermain Library, liars. Of course, she has a “right” to do this if she wishes, but in my book, it’s just bad behavior and should be censured (not censored) by those of us who still think civility is important. (An aside: this rudeness appearing in the Express is particularly ironic in light of Phil Keith’s column, Core Values, appearing this week, and Anthony Brandt’s column on civility (not currently available online) which appeared last week.)
I don’t wish to debate the absurd assumption that Ms. Leigh-Hunt makes about the intentions of the Library’s Trustees. It’s ridiculous on its face. However, I would like to pose the following questions to Ms. Leigh-Hunt:
- Which of your neighbors serving on the board of trustees do you think is lying to you? Would you stand up in a board meeting face to face with the trustees and say to one or all of them “You are a liar?”
- Can you back up your accusation with facts, rather than rumor and innuendo?
- If one or more of the Trustees are lying, what is their reason for doing so? In most situations where public figures find it necessary to lie to the public, you can figure out why they’re lying by “following the money.” Somewhere, someone’s got something to gain by lying. Where’s the money in this case? The Library Trustees, as you well know, are volunteers with no personal financial stake at risk, and no potential personal gain possible from an expanded library. Why would they find it necessary to lie about their intentions vis a vis the library building?
- Who is your “reliable source?” If this source has so much reliable information, why isn’t he or she sharing it with the public? I know it’s hard to believe, but you were manipulated by someone spreading yet another ridiculous rumor about the Library’s expansion plans. What’s this one, number 1,438? Wise up, Ms. Leigh-Hunt. Your source knew that by providing you with his bit of misinformation, you’d rear up like the sword of righteousness and do exactly what you did; something he or she did not have the courage to do for him or herself.
I could go on with this, but I know it won’t make any difference. As Phil Keith pointed out in his column in the Express, by the time one is an adult it’s too late to learn a core value like civility. Let me just say this as a reminder to all of you who feel the call to righteousness burning within: you are not exempt from civil behavior just because you think you’re right.
